Here’s the definition: Person who cannot complete a blog post because she is too busy making quilt blocks, reading books about mushrooms and encyclopedias, learning to draw feet, mangling “Pictures at an Exhibition” on the piano, making jewelry for a friend, playing Draw Something with six people, redesigning her art room, making a collage with stuff from American Style magazine, rearranging her desk. . .
“Dilettante” isn’t right, because every single one of these things is a deep engagement. “Dabbler,” isn’t good either, because it’s just a synonym of “dilettante.” Nobody’s diagnosed me with ADD, nor have I been accused of piddling, lollygagging, or even squandering time.
Back in May, when I attacked an innocent trash can after I learned when my hip surgery was scheduled, I thought I saw the summer slipping away in gimpiness. Actually, though, the opposite has happened. What a pleasant surprise! My bum hip does not really stop me from doing a lot of the things I love, and it gives me an excuse to stay home and do them. In fact, if it weren’t for the whole kitchen-on-the-first-floor problem, I probably wouldn’t come downstairs for days at a time.
In terms of sheer creative energy, I haven’t been this productive in months. Except where writing is concerned. Dang. Isn’t that what I do? So, since somebody has to jump-start this brain, here are the words for today, and then I’m going back to quilting.
Circumspousulatory, (cir-come-SPOUS-u-la-oh, who cares) adj., things done in a hurry to look productive because one’s spouse is coming up the stairs.
Distractivore, (dis-TRACT-e-Vor), n, person who lives on a variety of activities because oooh, shiny!
fabriciphile, (fa-BRIK-e-File), n., person who fondles fabric. Considered a criminal in Alabama.
Fungisnub, (FUN-gis-nub), v., the act of ignoring an attention-seeking animal, usually a dog, in favor of reading about mushrooms. (n., fungisnubber. fungisnubulation.)
Pedigraphy, (PED-e-graff-ee), n., the apparently impossible art of drawing feet.
Technodistractable, (TEK-no-dis-TRACT-ibble), adj., descriptive of a person who cannot get away from the incredibly cool computer game she just downloaded.
Woofler, (WOOF-ler), v, .talking nonsense to the dog in order to gain just five more minutes of time at the sewing machine before taking him out to pee.